I was born blond

By: chesshirecat

Feb 01 2009

Category: Blond, Bristol, Bristol Speedway, broke, out of gas


Focal Length:13.6mm
Shutter:1/0 sec
Camera:FinePix S5000

Believe me, when it comes to dumb moments, I make sure to live up to the blond reputation.
It was warm today. After spending the morning taking care of my Mom’s needs, come 1 PM I found myself out in the carport with my little lady (my bike). I rolled her out into the drive way, inserted the key…twisted the wick a few times..opps forgot to turn on the gas…OK now twist the wick…push that button and listen to her as she coughs and spits to life. She is a Florida bike, and really don’t care for the cold. All in all though, I’ve had some pretty cold blooded bikes…she’s better than some.

Got her cranked up, sat on her back and put on my helmet. Checked the choke..pushed it in a degree…and waited a moment longer. Couldn’t wait anymore…kicked her into gear…and slowly let out the clutch…she spit at me…but with a little finesse, as always, she moved forward.

Once out on the road, I realized I was a bit chilly. I stopped at Jeff’s work, he came out to greet me…I put on my jacket…he zipped me up…too many clothes I guess. Jeff asks me: “You have money?” “yup” says I, and he leans in to give me a kiss.

I have my helmet back on and I’m kickin down once more…off we go. I’m smiling from ear to ear. It feels really good. Jump onto 19E towards Bristol, which T’s into 11E. Head east on 11E and ride up into Bristol. I decide to stop at the Speedway, and get some pics of my bike there at the huge stadium…or what ever you wanna call it. I got some good ones, but they are on the putor upstairs with Jeff, who is sleeping, so I will have to load them tomorrow.

Leaving the Speedway, I head into Bristol proper. I’ve been through here several times, and you know I realized I never got a picture of the famous sign which straddles Bristol TN and Bristol VA. so I made a slight detour to get that picture too.

Off I head, I’m jumping on I-81 North…gonna jump on 19 North. I’m on the interstate for less than a mile, get off at my exit, and I happen to see the HD dealership. I’m still cold, and I wanted to get something to cover my face. I stop at Black (something) HD (I think maybe it’s Blackwater HD..???) Turn off the bike, swing my leg off the bike, take off my helmet and gloves. I then reach to readjust my purse…and that’s when I realize…that I didn’t have my purse with me…that wasn’t my purse strapped over my shoulder, but my fricken camera…duh…I’ve had the camera off my shoulder several times, and never noticed I didn’t have my purse. I didn’t have my purse, my wallet, my driver’s licence, or ANY FRICKEN MONEY! Freak-out…I look down at the speedo with my mileage…shit, I’m closing in on 47 miles on the speedo. That means, I don’t have enough gas to get home. SHIT SHIT SHIT…
OK get back on, switch on the key…push the button, slap her down into first, let out the clutch and get the hell outta Dodge…heading back home.

All the way home…I traveled no faster than 45MPH. I wanted to squeeze as many miles outta her I could. I know when I’m traveling on the hiway, 74 to 78 miles completely drains her. So if I run real slow…maybe get close enough to not piss off who ever has to come to my rescue???? I hoped so.

OK, well I almost made it back to Jeff’s work. I was less than 1/8 of a mile from him when the bike coughed and went empty. I turned the petcock up to reserve…and got another 25 feet. OK>>>>>>so now I realize the petcock is stuck…and I have no reserve. Damn it. OK, call Jeff, tell him where I am…and he tells me to wait it out. Yuppers, 45 mins later here he is with the fuel can. Good, I’m filled up and outta there…

I get home…and well…that’s all folks!


7 comments on “I was born blond”

  1. Not a bad little adventure. I’m glad you got rescued, but I bet that 45 mins seemed more like an hour and a half. Running out of gas sucks. Doing it with no dough on you sucks more! I know you like the peanut tank’s style and nostalgia and so on, but it’s cuz of stuff like you just went thru that I was glad my 1200C had the newer 4.5 gallon tank that gets me close to 200 miles before going on reserve.I hope you get that petcock fixed! My first bike was an 81 Honda CB650, and I got stuck on it one time. I was pretty green then and since I was on my way to see a girl I was dating, my mind was racing with lots of other thoughts, none of which was how many miles I’d gone since fueling. When she sputtered I switched over – nothing. Shit! I was stuck WAY out in the western part of Mass on the turnpike. It’s as desolate out there at night as any lonely stretch of big slab you’ve ever been on, and it was pitch black.So, I get her off in the breakdown lane as far as I could and put my flashers on. Except they dont work. Great. Over the next few hours, all I could do was turn the key on when I saw cars coming. Wore the battery down much faster than I figured. Nobody stopped and I didn't see a single State Trooper. The only thing that kept me calm was the S&W Model 586 .357 magnum I had in a shoulder holster under my leather. I'm not one who carrys all the time, but I was never so glad I decided to THIS time. You never know what whacko you can run into out in the middle of nowhere on the side of the road, and I wasn't planning on ending up in a dumpster somewhere.Just when I was wondering if I'd have to sleep in the bushes off the side of the highway, I saw a headlight. Just one. Yeah, it was a bike! With battery dead, I could only signal him with my cigarette lighter. He stopped; had his OL on back, but he had a sidecar! I was psyched – I'd always wanted a ride in a sidecar. But, wouldn't you know, just as the guy was unsnapping the cover on it, the darkness was broken by the bursts of blue from the light bar of the State cop who pulled up.Tow cost me $100 bucks. G/F was in a panic cuz I was so over-due. Kind of ruined the mood for the whole night. Can't remember if I got laid or not – so if I did – it must not have been that good ;)To this day, I STILL haven't gotten a ride in a sidecar…

  2. Wonderful story Joker!Actually, I figure, what does it matter if I have a 3.3 or a 2.3 gallon tank? In fact with the 3.3 I would be assured of being even farther away from whatever or where ever…because of the distance. The trick is to be focused when you get ready to ride. Not just on the ride, but before the ride. Taking care of details eliminates many of the irritable risks that will assuredly pop up.Never get so excited to get the hell out of the house that you forget to take the stuff you need to be comfortable on the road. No matter if it’s just a short half day trip like this one…or a six month gypsy trip…

  3. Make that:”…because of the amount of fuel in the tank…”Not: “…because of the distence…”

  4. What would any ride be without a little bit of adventure. And you’re absoultely right about being focused before the ride. The pre-flight checklist if you will. There’s a fun place that covers stuff just like that over here.

  5. Was the purse where you left it?I remember a phone call I got the Summer of 05 you were West bound on 40 driving thru RAIN / Thunder Storm. At the same time I am East Bound on 10 about FT.Stockton it is beautiful weather I am loving my ride.You are about to flash a trucker your Right titie to borrow a 9/16 wrench. Then on your next leg you have some starting problems, probably from riding in the rain.I am trying to Pep talk you on to where ever it is that you are headed.As I am in the SAME State and having the best ride I could imagine.I told you in one of those Pep talks somewhere around Tucumcari NM, as I recall, to put a $20 or a $100 somewhere on your bike so if some trucker or bad guy rip your purse off at some rest stop or bridge you stop at to evade weather, you would have enough $$ to get to your next big stop.Obviously you did not comply. You Blond?As always Pap ;^)

  6. Pappy, yes the purse was where I left it…in my Mom’s car. I’m gonna tell you, I started laughing my ass off while reading your comment! I had forgotten I had called you about this predicament…and I had almost put the titty flashing on I-40 behind me! LOL I will never forget that, best breakdown story I will ever have I think.I did keep a bill on the bike, just as you had suggested, until I had the bike in for the top end last year. I removed it…didn’t want the shop to get a tip before I inspected the work…ya know? OK, well I forgot to put the money back. I will now!Thank you Pappy…for always being here for me. You’re the best riding buddy I’ve ever known.I was born a blond…it’s in my blood. (Dad’s family is of Norwegian decent.)

  7. I’m kinda blonde … just some days blonder than others.Great story !Did the length of your beautiful State once and got to where we were going’ earlier than when we left ! Know some fine people in TN as well. Hope to get back there soon.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

D. Brent Miller

Writer & Photographer

The Zombie Squad Elite

Gear to Survive the Zombie Apocalypse

Girly Gabble

A Relatable Women's Lifestyle & Self-Help Blog

Bucket List Publications

Indulge- Travel, Adventure, & New Experiences

This Blog Left Intentionally Blank

May contain nuts. Parental discretion is advised.

What's Hot with Bobber and Chopper Motorcycles

South Side Kustoms Bobbers and Choppers

Riding2up Blog

Riding2up Motorcycle Adventure

RoadsideWonders Annex

* a tiny little division of roadsidewonders.net


We are the next-gen motorcycle builders

Traveling250's Blog

Pain, Curiosity and a Bear


Attempts at things

The Bon Voyage Blog

Thoughts, experiences and opinions on travel to North America from the UK's leading USA tailor-made holiday experts.

Kelly Goddard

Photography from St. Augustine Fla.


Our Motorcycle Blog about Motorcycle Stuff

Art Decor Portraits Blog

Tell us what you think?

Adventures and Curves Blog

Just another WordPress.com site


“I began OKLAHOMA BIKER to realistically portray the biker lifestyle to the citizenry of Oklahoma. Our mission is to communicate what it means to be an Oklahoma biker and to illustrate the brotherhood existing between Oklahoma bikers.”


Just another WordPress.com site

%d bloggers like this: